Effects of Divorce on Children

A behavioural study conducted in 1998 concluded that in more than 76 percent of divorce cases, children display high levels of self esteem and social development. This study was a survey done on more than 100 children of divorced families. The children were in the age group of 5-16 at the time the divorce occurred. Social psychologist and researcher, Ahrons states that divorce can also have a positive effect on children. A recent study showed that 78 percent of divorced children displayed symptoms of tolerance, flexibility and altruism.

But in most of the divorce cases, whether contested or uncontested, the effects on children are devastating. Research shows that boys find it tougher to adapt to a changed family situation than girls. Sociologists, based on longitudinal data of 100 individual case studies, concluded that the adverse effects of a divorce can be negated by the manner in which the child is told. Often, the child is used to hurt the parent or, used as an intermediary which causes further deterioration in the divorce. Divorce can be harmful causing loneliness, low self esteem and abusive behaviour in children.

Research suggests that toddlers have a hard time understanding and accepting the truth about their parents. The tendency in such cases is for the toddler to take the blame on himself/herself Daddy has left because I was bad

Another possible negative reaction can be of fear and insecurity. The toddler is left wondering whether the other parent is also likely to leave since the first parent has left. Divorce brings about feelings of aggression, stubbornness and a regression to infant behaviours such as bed wetting. Observation of 20 pre-school children in their first year after the divorce showed that they do not understand the meaning of divorce. The children believe that the parent will eventually come back and life will be as it used to be. However, when reality does set in, there can be reactions like temper tantrums and crying.

Primary school children handle divorce better than adolescents and teens. Research shows that divorce can lead to smoking, drinking, drug abuse and a disinterest in studies. Studies suggest that adolescents feel and display anger at divorce proceedings. This anger is translated into bullying and violent behaviour. Such children tend to suffer long after a divorce has occurred. They may question their own ability to successfully maintain a long term relationship. According to research, these children tend to develop symptoms of anti socialism. They tend to avoid social situations and may succumb to behavioural mental disorders. Divorce also brings about a lack of sensitivity and empathy causing the child to nurture symptoms of psychopathy.
Parental absence resulting from uncontested divorces causes the child to develop schizophrenic personality traits. Longitudinal research data shows that teens who are the victims of uncontested divorces are likely to develop psychosomatic disorders. They tend to abandon their studies more often as compared to teen victims of contested divorce cases.

Contested divorces usually indicate to the child that he is wanted by both parents. Children who undergo uncontested divorce proceedings are more prone to eating disorders of anorexia and bulimia. The child is more likely to become sexually active and a female child may become pregnant.
A recent study by social psychologists in the UK showed that children of divorced parents also carry physiological effects needing medical treatment. These children are more likely to develop heart troubles, asthma and muscular immobility. Studies also suggest that these children are more prone to compulsive gambling and betting as grown ups.

On the other side, Arhons states that children coming from divorced families tend to be more cooperative and adjustable. They are prone to high self esteem and motivation levels. These children are more goal-oriented, both family and career focused. Ahrons, in her study indicates that more than 60 percent of these children tend to become leaders in a social situation.

The UK legislature has passed various laws calling for better treatment and counselling of children entangled in divorces.