Having a Child is a Spiritual Experience

Having a Child is a Spiritual Experience. This is something that I don't remember hearing about beforehand, but wow! Depending on how the pregnancy goes, it can feel like forever or be a wonderful excuse to eat copious amounts of food (both for the mother-to-be and her empathetic husband), and to be indulged. It is a time to receive much positive attention from the grandparents-to-be, other family members, friends, co-workers and even strangers. There is lots of advice both asked for and unsolicited! There is much to do along the way, lists to make, things that “must” be done before the baby's arrival, etc. There are clothes to buy (both for the expectant mother and the baby-to-be), a nursery to prepare, doctor appointments, baby showers and countless other errands and tasks. Picking a name or names can be a challenge for many parents-to-be (see above re: unsolicited advice!). But when the time for delivery and the baby's actual arrival comes, very little can totally prepare you for such an event. It is a moment like no other, a time for humans to experience the miracle of creation and witness the birth of a newborn baby. It is a moment of heaven on earth for both the mother and the father to savor. Reading to Children Blesses both of You. Cradling an infant or holding a little one in your lap and reading to them is something to do over and over again. Long before babies can follow the story line, start reading to them! They love to hear your voice. Books are a wonderful way to strengthen the bonds between parent and child. Reading time can be a way to quiet an overly active child, a way to share and enjoy the books that you loved as a child, and a time to cuddle and just soak up the essence of your little ones. As children grow, don't stop reading to them or at least reading with them. Reading is a tradition that can be maintained throughout a lifetime, and brings countless blessings of closeness, memories and strengthened reading skills. Messes are a Part of Having Children. For those of us who tend to be type A or “fussy” about our surroundings, this is another opportunity for “personal growth”, ie. to be challenged! Babies bring lots of paraphernalia or “stuff”, even before they make their appearance. There is new furniture such as cribs, changing tables, high chairs and a chest of drawers. There are other “necessities” such as strollers, clothing, diapers, diaper bags, toys, books, cute picture frames, and more. It can be a challenge for a parent to keep all of this organized, but that is just the beginning! Once the little one becomes ambulatory he or she is then able to play with things, rearrange things and even destroy things!! Books and toys that have been carefully organized can become a big messy heap in less than a minute. New carpeting can be ruined by two well meaning little girls playing with a mother's bright red lipstick. You have been warned – this is a part of being a parent. Get used to it! Children aren't perfect. See the last few sentences above, and these are just the kinds of messes that parents can “clean up”. Sometimes children make choices and mistakes that aren't so easily resolved. Younger children may bite or hit other children. As they grow older they may not always be nice to other children, to their siblings, grandparents or even to you. Children can say hurtful things and sometimes do things that parents can't understand. Be prepared for some challenging moments such as being talked back to, having a special antique broken or even dishonesty. It is all part of being a parent and having normal children (no matter what other parents might say; their children aren't perfect either). Even the Best of Parents aren't Perfect. One of the hardest parts of being a parent is seeing something that you don't particularly like about yourself (or your spouse) show up in your children. There is nothing more important than raising children and we want to do it perfectly. However, we are all human and we all make mistakes. As parents, we get tired and sometimes don't respond to the more trying moments the way that we would like to. We may find ourselves saying things such as “Because I said so” or raising our voices in a way that we'd sworn we'd never do. Being a parent sometimes brings new insight to the scripture about the sins of the parents being passed on to their children. It can be painful. Children will accept our sincere apologies, especially if they know that we are trying hard to do our best and that we love them. The Responsibility is Awesome and the Joy Incomparable. There is a good reason why most parents are fairly young: if we fully realized ahead of time what we were getting ourselves into, we might be too afraid to even try! Raising a child or children is a huge, never-ending responsibility that at times will seem overwhelming. It will be physically, academically, emotionally and mentally challenging. There may even be times when you would like to run away. That is one reason why it is important to always make some time for you. Being a parent can be exhausting. The balance of that equation is that the moments and feelings of joy are truly incomparable. The intense feelings of love and happiness felt when all is well with one's child or children are truly indescribable, but other parents will know what you mean. It makes it all so worth it and you realize that having and raising children is what real life is all about.

In summary, the ongoing and never-ending experience of being a parent and raising children can teach a person more than just about anything else. Children can bring out the best in you and teach you what unconditional love really means. You literally would do anything for your child. The joy and love felt as a parent are immeasurable and expressions such as “heart-warming” or “a fullness of joy” take on new meaning. On the other hand, part of being a parent is to learn humbling lessons. It is hard to be patient when operating on little or no sleep, and sometimes parenting can be lonely or even boring. It requires much unselfishness to do it right. Heartache is sometimes a part of the parental experience; learning isn't always easy or pleasant. These are some of the important lessons to be experienced and learned as a parent, and hopefully the learning never stops. In addition to the richness, joy and meaning that children bring to life, if a person is really lucky they will one day become grandparents. I've heard that that is the best of all!